I don't know what has happened in the last weeks, maybe it's the 11ths that came back from poland, maybe it's the holocost day in two days, maybe it's the poland-closure meeting we had just now, or maybe... it's just the time that passed. and everyone says that the longer that passes, you get it more. but somehow, in the last few weeks, i'm just... much more... excited about... holocost. not excited in the happy mean (morfix wasn't able to translate it to my like), but everytime i think or speak or hear about the holocost i have tears in my eyes, and i feel... much more connected to the subject, that wasn't close to me at all before. i heard stories, a lot of evidences, a lot about the natzis, and i'm pretty sure i knew a little more about the holocost than some people that their relatives were murdered in poland. but it wasn't close to me. like a forgein country i know about. but afterwards... afterwards... after 5 and a half months since i came back from poland, i just... feel... something... more.
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i'm really not good at describing, huh?

it was really important to me to do the holocost day ceremony. i don't know why, but when i understood i wasn't going to be a part of it i had tears in my eyes (and it wasn't the hormons!), because i realized i wasn't going to pay the respect in my way.
no one understands me. teriffic!

umm umm.
bye